I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
