Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
