I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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