I have demons in me.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
