i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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