So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
