youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize