If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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