sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
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