I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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