i jhust puked up my retainher.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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