I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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