He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
