They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
