I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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