only if we run a train.
done.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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