we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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