Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
