if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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