the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
This beer is not sobering me up at all
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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