At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
