Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
