Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
