No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
