Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
