Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I will pee on everything he values.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize