I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
