Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
