My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
