I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize