I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
