kristin has been a bad kristin
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Randomize
