Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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