What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Randomize
