I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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