Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
