I understand why you refuse to be sober now
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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