Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
NoShamevember. You game?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
