If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
This is not my ceiling
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
