Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
