I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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