I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
