If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
