You really coming over, don't trick.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
