hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize