hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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