yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915