32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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