Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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