That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
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Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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