My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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